“A sadist is defined as, a person who has the condition of sadism, in which one receives sexual gratification from causing pain and degradation to another. 2. a person who enjoys being cruel.

Is this correct? I love being controlled but don’t want to be degraded or humiliated [or] hurt in any way…”

Another wonderful question from lovegood, and here is my reply: Yes, I am a sadist in the truest sense of the word–and I am also Dominant, empathetic, and rather endlessly creative with a broad range of interests beyond just that specific one.

Some of my callers have never seen the sadistic side of me, and some of them have difficulty believing it even exists.

For them, I’m Dominant, I’m controlling, but they’ve never felt the caustic edge to my wit, never felt the imagined sting of my whip, or heard me gleefully describe all the beautifully painful things I want them to do for me—and they never will. The reason why is it wouldn’t benefit them. I know they’re not into pain, or humiliation, and it won’t help them on their journey into submission for me to impose that specific kink on them. There are soooo many other ways that we can play where we’ll both be having fun that I never feel like I need to ‘convert’ someone who’s not into pain. If they want to explore it–I’ll happily guide them, but I won’t deliberately lead them down a road they have no interest in being on in the first place.

Dominance can exist without Sadism

I don’t need to be cruel, and I don’t need to hear a submissive whimper in pain for me to enjoy myself, or for me to be in control. Just by calling me, by letting me know about your fantasies…you’re giving me power. You’re surrendering some of the most private parts of yourself, and you’re enabling me to turn your mind into my personal playground. There are few things I adore more in this world than the ability to manipulate your fantasies, your mind, and take you on a journey to the secrets parts of yourself & your desires that you keep hidden from (nearly) everyone. For those moments, you’re mine–and I love it. I enjoy Dominance every bit as much as I enjoy sadism. Sometimes, they go together; sometimes, they don’t–but I’m always having fun, and I like to make sure that you are, too 🙂

When it comes to pain…

I’m a good-natured sadist, and for the callers who enjoy receiving pain (ie: masochists; such as those who love CBT, humiliation/degradation, & impact play) I am an attentive, cheerful, and deeply amused Princess of Pain who will laugh and giggle as they whimper and scream–not from malice, but from sheer enjoyment. The sounds they make are music to my ears. I am also a creative equal opportunity sadist: whether it’s physical or psychological pain, your mind doesn’t discriminate, so neither do I. Hearing my sweet voice describe the diabolical things I want you to do for me, or verbally flaying your psyche to ribbons is something a few of my callers absolutely adore.

S/M is a part of BDSM that resonates with me every bit as much as D/s

While it’s not for everyone, for those of us who DO enjoy it, the thrill and endorphin rush is like nothing else. It’s a fantastic game we get to play; and while I take my subs safety very seriously, I never lose sight of the fact that for me, this is fun—and I want to make sure they’re enjoying the experience too.

If any more of my readers have questions they’d like answered, feel free to ask them on the comments section of my blog!